Interview with Lord Balderdash

HH: What do you think of the state of the world?
LB: I really don’t concern myself much with that. A lot of life to enjoy, newspapers to print, and drawings to draw? What do you think of the state of the world? I have been around much too long to know anything–it all gets crumpled into one thing.
HH: Why do you look at a sketch book when I’m interviewing you your Lordship?
LB: I think you inspire me to paint, should I exaggerate your nose or your eyes?
HH: What do you attribute your longevity to?
LB: Very little salt, stress, and sadness.
HH: Why do you keep tilting my head?
LB: Do you want to look like one of those convicts on the local news. Stay still.
HH: What was the most harrowing experience in your life?
LB: I would say covering the Crimean War, but now I think it is getting this angle right. You have a frightfully symmetrical face.
HH: Anything to add?
LB: Yes, my signature, you may keep this drawing!